caveat hipster

there was this guy.
If he couldn't get any beer
or alchohol
in the evening
he would start killing people

then he landed in minneapolis on a sunday morning. 
the last place you wanna be
if you wanna drink
but he didn't know that
after all, he'd just landed there.
and he had 10 bucks to his name

some guy said
"you should go to wisconsin"
because in wisconsin you can always buy stuff

there were guys in hockey jerseys driving east
"how far is wisconsin?"
the border is about 20 miles east
just over the Saint Croix River

so, the journey began
otherwise he would start killing
at about 3:37 pm

"inxa allah"

it was a countdown for the lutherans
their legislation had also written their fate

once you get over the mississippi
and into saint paul
you can start to rid yourself of the sickness
the idiot-suckoff begins to vanish
and in F. Scott Fitzgerald's old commons
the people are far more jesus-like
less disgusting

when i say jesus-like
i mean tits falling out of shirts
pussy water coming out of their shorts
and still serving up a cold hamms
which cost our man only 2 dollars at 4pm.  

now, he has 6 dollars
because he lost another two when he was in Dinkerton
tried to shake some shack-lass for love
but she only gave blah
that cost two bucks

our man drinks his hamms
looks around
wants to stay
cannot

wisconsin is 10 miles out
when he sees the bridge
he will cry

when he sees the bridge
he won't kill nobody
alright

that sucking bridge over the majesty
over the saint croix killer